Mental X Mindset

I’d like to start by acknowledging those of you who have been following me on my journey and supporting my writing – thank you. I appreciate every single one of you, particularly those who in my absence from writing have taken the time to contact me via social media sharing their thoughts on my blogging. Your support does not go unnoticed.

For the past two years I’ve neglected my writing, life got in the way and I’m sure you can all relate to that. I made a promise to myself, I vowed to write REAL things, things in which felt right when I put the words on paper. I didn’t and still don’t want to write for the sake of it, I want to remain free spirited and express myself organically; for myself and those who have supported me thus far. So, here goes nothing…

I’ve been growing as a person these past few years, happily experiencing new things and cautiously accepting the flaws of myself & those around me. As if that wasn’t enough, I’ve been left with the great task of dealing with the trials & tribulations of  young adulthood…

We live in this beautiful, dark, sinister and twisted world where we get older physically, wiser mentally and stronger emotionally. I’ve come to realize the importance of inner peace and the acknowledgement of ones mental health. We ALL underestimate the importance of how powerful our brain is, it seems to be natural, doesn’t it? We can do anything if we set our mind to it, positive or negative.
You could be chasing a dream, achieving a personal goal, abusing drugs or even attempt to take your own life and that’s the scary part, because once your brain is sent that signal to act in a negative situation, it’s damn near impossible to stop. That being said, it CAN be helped!

Let me explain… In your 20’s for example your mental state is of the most importance because your journey through life and finding yourself is all dependent on it. Finding your destiny is dependent on it.

Whatever you go through in life you never have to go through it alone. Understandably, not everyone is a people’s person but God (or science whatever you believe in) didn’t put seven billion people on earth for us to be fighting psychological battles alone. When it comes to dealing with personal problems mentally I always advise openness. Speak to someone you trust because as people we are far more vigorous together than alone. People are here for you so you don’t ever have to feel alone in this world.
As someone who has had first hand experience with this, I’d like to tell you all a story close to my heart. I had a friend who lost his intellect and began to feel paranoia, paranoia over people and the environment he was in. He became uncomfortable being out in the open, doing normal things in public. This is someone I grew up with, someone I had direct contact with regularly, so at first I didn’t understand. I thought it wasn’t serious until he started to doubt me as someone who was “spying on him” as well as being paid by the government to watch him, bearing in mind this was someone I’ve known for 10+ years. To cut a long story short, what I learned from him was the lack of communication he had with people caused him to hold in all his emotions which evidently got the better of him.  However, once he got out of this mental institution he put himself in and started to surround himself with pure whole-hearted  people who cared for him I slowly started seeing my friend become stable, become himself, become mentally free. I have to admit that I wasn’t aware my friend was going through this until he contacted me, so what I’m trying to say here people is mental health is REAL! You never know who could be going through this so please please check on your family&friends.

That being said, I’d like to end this by giving gratitude. Gratitude for our women who will one day go on to be great mothers to the next generation of geniuses. Your mindset is just as important as your image. A beautiful spiritual healthy mind is far more important to have than a good looking image which fades, your mind-set never gets old it only gets better with age. I like to believe girls never focus on the guys who bring them flowers but focus on those who don’t. Start to appreciate people in your life who give more than they take from you, focus on those who genially care for you because you haven’t got much except a few people who really care about you In this world. Forget those whose love you with limits, love is endless, the size of rivers & lakes , so I urge you to love those who have love for you, as big as an ocean. You bring life into this world, this shows your importance, it doesn’t get any deeper than that ladies.


“It’s up to you today to start making healthy choices. Not choices that are just healthy for your body, but healthy for your mind.”
― Steve Maraboli


Text written by Marco Jair Lopez

Oct 22, 2016

England, London


Regardless of your intentions for the future – who you surround yourself with is ALWAYS important. Friends are Gods way of replacing relatives you may not necessarily take to. Take myself for example, I am truly appreciative of the people I consider to be friends due to their empowered  characteristics. They play an enormous part in my day to day life; influencing both my attitude and mentality, and I am ever so thankful. I once thought friendship was about quantity, what it’s really about is quality. Clichè but true. Loyalty and honesty, are key, more so than consistency and availability. To know the difference between friends and associates, is to be wise. I was once told “ Forget those who forget you “ – a small piece of advice yet powerful in it’s content.

I decided to write this piece for the new year due witnessing friendship groups constantly repeating the same mistakes. It could be denial or the fact nobody takes the time to learn about others, that’s the MISSING key, acknowledgement. Acknowledge that sometimes what one friend will experience is for your benefit, its for you to learn from his/her situation in order for you to know better. People are valuable sources, filled with knowledge, we have got to start taking notes of all the precious little things. Learn from your friends experiences. Everyone makes mistakes, everyday we try make one less mistake than we did yesterday. So i ask everyone to observe their surroundings. As you finish reading this, I would like you to go and check on your friends because sometimes a small ” How was your day ” or ” How are you ” can make someone`s day.

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I know this isn’t a relationship advice or love blog. So while I’m on this topic just to clear the air on friendships … do not allow your significant other to tell you he/she is good friends or “best-friends” with someone they have experienced an intimate moment with, kissing in particular. That knot can be undone one day, with ease.


To add, yes a male can have an innocent friendship with a female whilst in a relationship – vice versa. This can only happen if there hasn’t been any form of sexual contact or hidden feelings brushed under the carpet. Besides, that friend isn’t really a friend if something has happened in the past, that someone is just waiting for the time your partner gives it up to them and trust me they have all the time in the world to wait.

“ Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything.”

― Muhammad Ali


Text written by Marco Jair Lopez

Feb 11, 2015

England, London

Thought Of Failure

I’d like to start by expressing my greatest gratitude and thanking all those who have viewed my blog and supported my writing, the feedback is absolutely amazing.

WOW, Failure! The word FAIL in itself gives you remembrances of all the times you felt hopeless & inadequate. The thought of failure is almost certainly something that haunts us all and is one of the hardest obstacles to overcome particularly when you’re just a teenager. There is an abundant amount of pressure we’ve all had to face in a timely manner, due to others wanting to see you succeed. The thought of failure is something you just can’t handle. Well, I’ve failed countless times, I mean who hasn’t right? Failing isn’t as bad as it may seem, so don’t feel like it’s the end of the world if you don’t accomplish everything you’ve wanted in the timeframe you’ve imagined. Sometimes failure is the commencement of a new chapter for you. One thing we as humans all have in common in life is failure; we have all failed at something at one point or another. Some have experienced this more than others, it is the strength within us that encourages us to pick ourselves up and push past the difficulties we face. This message is for those who are still haunted by failure, who feel disheartened and useless.

There have been many times in my life where I have failed and without a word of doubt it was one of the hardest times of my life. The most difficult challenges I’ve faced were because of my lack of understanding, understanding failure. Trust me when I tell you failure doesn’t mean you are stupid or unworthy, it solely means you weren’t prepared or able to figure things out in the first instance. So, don’t knock yourself down YOU CAN get back up, failure allows you to learn about yourself, it’s a journey towards success. You can’t blame anyone but yourself once you fail, failure teaches you integrity and understanding. Some of us fail more than others because we’re not taking the time to reflect and understand where the problem is, it isn’t that you can’t succeed – the problem is that you haven’t learnt to accept your wrongs.

Three things failure has taught me:

  • Accept the things you cannot change
  • Have courage to change the things you can
  • Have the wisdom to know the difference

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So before you beat yourself up ask yourself if you have reached your full potential. I am positive you can battle failure and succeed in whatever you’re searching for. I’ve failed countless times and it bashed my confidence, self-esteem and pride nevertheless when realisation kicked in everything changed for me as a simple result of me realising i can’t base my life around the thought of this one failure, I mean I will fail in life many times before I succeed, right? There is more to me and there’s more to you too. Some people want to see you fail and you owe them, pay them back with success, stand your ground, keep pushing and strive towards greatness. Slow progress is better than no progress after all. Don’t fear the thought of failing, use it as ammunition, work hard, take risks and do what you have to because in the end it’ll be a great learning curve. You want to be able to look back at life 6-7 years from now and say the old you would be so proud of the person you are today because of how you rose above the infamous fear factor.

“When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important.”

― Ellen DeGeneres

Text written by Marco Jair Lopez

Nov 12, 2014

England, London

Believe In Believing

Believing in yourself is probably one of the hardest things to do when you have no reason to, especially when all you see is nothing but someone who has lost all hope or value, someone who isn’t really looked at when they walk by on the street, someone who as time passes by nobody notices. How can you believe in yourself when nobody does, how ?

Deep within yourself you can’t figure out something, something you see that is worth you having thoughts of believing you could be something other than a failure. I want to share this story with you guys. This story is about a boy who’s never once had any reason to believe in himself nor believe in believing that one day he could be something. This boy was always different from the rest but he never really had a reason to believe in himself, so because all he has ever gone through have been a constant wave of downfalls from an awfully young age. He began to wander the streets looking for hope as that was the only time he had to reflect on himself. He always questioned “ Will i ever be something more than this “ something more than this boy who has nothing positive going for himself. He wanted perfection, he strived for it, though accepting that there wasn’t anything “perfect” about him. Taking into account every negative thing in his past, kept a positive state of mind. As this boy got older he always remembered where he had come from, as time went by the past began to fade although he still remembered the hard times. I will pause that story there.


Believing is something that starts from within, how can someone believe in you when you don’t even believe in yourself – question that! You have got to start with you, if you want to be heard & seen it all starts with YOU. Believe in what you see within yourself, believe in what you hear from within yourself. All of those things will give you comfort and within yourself you will automatically believe that whatever is out there is within your reach regardless of the circumstances. Everything starts from you. I recommend you read the article Law Of Attraction, it talks about the importance of self belief. There may be days where you lack inner belief because the burdens of life get on top of you, that doesn’t mean you lose belief in yourself. Always remember hope is bigger than fear, fear is a mental state which can be tackled by hope & belief.

“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” – Lao Tzu
Text written by Marco Jair Lopez

Oct 21, 2014

England, London



Confidence is almost the same thing as when i speak of being yourself but it has its own twist to it. Being confident as a person is something I 100% know and probably my strongest trait, I know how it feels to go from someone that has 0 confidence within themselves in terms of how I look, how I act and my own opinions always felt like anything to do with me just wasn’t valid, I was afraid to come out my shell to then having 100% confidence but its not a thing to brag about, having confidence isn’t something you can show off to people its something you show within yourself.


Confidence is a trait that not all have but yes we can all build on it and have it in its own particular way, so what helped me become confident was my past experiences mixed with the music I listen to, so I began to realise while I mixed both those things together i started coming out of my shell more, then eventually I stood on my feet and was finally able to like what I saw of myself, accepted my actions because that was me and those that didn’t like it don’t matter and those that matter don’t mind it.


You know we can all sit there and moan about how bad its been, how you don’t have it easier or how one is better because they have this that and the other. But better than all of that is YOU we all have our own stories, they don’t call history “HIS-STORY” for no reason so embrace that about yourself, while you’re alive everyday you’re creating your story be proud and be confident of who you are, so instead of complaining how you could be better think about how it could be much worse but your still here and that is where confidence should come in as a person. Our experiences and challenges should be making you stronger for the next day don’t compare yourself to others because we are all different and i feel like that is what people have forgotten about themselves.


Confidence is what helps you lead and explore, without it you won’t be able to move on as a person, you won’t really learn new things about yourself, you will rather take someone elses solution to your problem not knowing that they aint you, the advice may be good but they don’t walk away with the emotions you do so that is why i speak on having confidence, its very important even if its little as long as its a start. Confidence is that inner voice in your body that constantly gives you reminders about yourself the moment you feel upset over something. So if you wish to ever be anything in this world you have to start first by building your confidence because you will need that guidance within. I am going to end this post with one of my secrets this amazing Steve Jobs speech that i feel like is relevant to this topic but I took out a section of it.


“ Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life

Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’sthinking

Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice

And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. “

Text written by Marco Jair Lopez

Oct 9, 2014

England, London

Know your WORTH !!!

The reason I speak of knowing your worth is because I believe it’s very important knowing your value. You know it hurts me when I see people who have such great potential within themselves, but they just don’t know their worth. If you ask me why, it’s either someone hasn’t showed them that there is a light at the end of the tunnel that they couldn’t see, or it’s because they didn’t realise there’s a left you was suppose to take to where the light is. So sometimes it is someone who shows you your potential. So I ask you to surround yourself with people that not only motivate you to do whatever it is you do, but that literally see something extraordinary in you that you can’t see yourself, and makes you question, why do they see me bigger than I see myself? That’s the type of people you keep around.

There’s no time to give energy to people who bring nothing but bad breath and negativity to your life, because it’s about bettering your mentality and being headstrong in this world. You’ll meet some really dark, twisted people who will run through your weaknesses quicker than you can think. And by the time they’re done with you, you’re filled with nothing but dark emotions and feel worthless. I know that feeling. I know how it feels not knowing when things are going to stop. If you’ve ever felt like you wasn’t enough for somebody or felt like you aren’t good enough to be around certain crowds of people. Felt like all people do is tread over you, well that’s because you don’t know your worth.

I want you to drop them thoughts and emotions of feeling like you wasn’t enough, feeling like you can’t be more, always feeling less of yourself. Turn that negative into a positive because maybe it isn’t you, maybe it’s them. My biggest fear in this world is to feel worthless, not having a real value, feeling like a nobody. I felt like that once and told myself I’d never go back there and that’s why I am where I stand today; because I no longer look at myself like I am the outsider.

You know no one has a clue about what you have been through in your life, so why live it feeling worthless. So this is what you do. You’ve got to rise above your problems that are making you feel low – easier said than done yes. I’ve been through some pretty traumatizing things in my life, but it hasn’t prevented me from feeling content with myself. My main quote in life is, “God doesn’t throw something at you that you can’t handle” and He really doesn’t. All the problems that you go through in life are supposed to make you twice the person you are, not break you. Feel beautiful. Feel loved.  Look in the mirror and love yourself everyday. You are just as great as everybody else; if you’re in need of reassurance, speak to that somebody who truly believes in you and be around them. You should feed off peoples’ energy and absorb that emotion they have for you and let that be the reason why you stand strong.


You will know when you have found your worth. You will see it’s almost impossible to go back to that dark place where it’s lonely. You will care less about things and as time goes by, you will learn things about yourself that you once wouldn’t believe you could do. Once you know your worth, there is no looking back.

“If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.”

Text written by Marco Jair Lopez
October 2, 2014

England, London

The power of being yourself, the power of YOU.

Where do i start ? when i say YOU who do you think of straight away ?

No, I am not talking of the person you pretend to be when everyone is watching, I am not talking of all the other people you try act like besides YOU, thats who am talking about here its YOU the person who when you look into your ID it only says your name and nobody elses you know from time to time i think some people ID`s should have all the rest of the names they tend to act like but thats a whole other story, when you look in the mirror that individual there is whose attention i seek because am here to tell you to stop trying to fit in, stop minimizing yourself to be around people who wouldn’t accept the real you, so you gotta hide your inner self and be this individual that people think they know but they dont really really know your just trying to fit in like the rest and be average.

I always say the mirror is the truth you can’t look in the mirror and tell a lie so i always tell people you wanna know the truth about yourself look in that mirror and tell me who you are right now is what your happy with, bring out your inner self forget what people think or care about you because you will find yourself stuck in a maze for a very long time if you care more about other peoples opinions and comments than you care of yourself, so why hide ? why feel like you’re not good enough ? why feel like you’re the one who must adapt, you got to be the leader in your life and be proud of that image in the mirror, you come first by any means necessary, question if thats how you would want your cousins or siblings to live, i always say the truth will set you free. I found myself lost when i was around the age of 15 to 18 until i realised i gotta stop all this trying to be something am not, keeping up with this trend and the latest thing it wasn’t really who i was, i thought it was about fitting in and following people slowly i started to realise that i forgot about myself due to being busy with what people thought about me but i stepped out the box once and saw how deluded i was because half the crowd i was around couldn’t care less about me if something deep was to occur.

So as time went by i grew and matured and started being myself more started leading by example because i would want my friends and relatives to realise being true to yourself is the key and even till now anyone can tell you am myself, i don’t try to be anything but me some will hate that because they couldn’t ever take that risk.  One day when i found that comfort within me and looked in the mirror it told me the truth BE YOURSELF forget about what everyone thinks because this is your life and nobody elses you only get one chance at life so why waste it caring about what people think and trying to fit in, for what i ask ? there’s a reason why when somebody calls YOUR name only you turn to listen not everyone else, before anything integrity comes first and knowing yourself is the greatest goal you can acquire and once you do you will feel the same power i feel when i walk in these streets the power of feeling comfort within, love yourself first and even on your lowest days you will be able to stand.



“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

Text written by Marco Jair Lopez
September 30, 2014

England, London